User Blogs

4 days ago no Comment

It’s been a minute since my last post. I couldn’t seem to find the words to put down. So I have been doing a lot of sitting alone with the thoughts. I’ve been hiding. I admit it. I’ve been with my head in the sand again. Trying to not deal with the reality of my […]

2 weeks ago no Comment

I opted out of the EMDR this week because there was simply too much going on and I know how it drains me. I had a complete cleaning of the house, and a ton of food to prep for dad to have his army buddies over for their poker game. It’s really good for him […]

3 weeks ago no Comment

I’m finding it hard to write about these two sessions as they focused on my auto responses in my living situation. I’ve put it off due to the self analysis that it has created. I again have realized how preprogrammed I have become to accepting whatever is asked of me, told to me to do, […]

4 weeks ago no Comment

My session on this past Friday was equally as exhausting as the first. I am becoming more vocal. Less meek in my interactions with my father and those around me. I have a voice. I don’t have to just lie down and accept verbal harassment and (calling it what it is) abuse. I can tell […]

1 month ago no Comment

I’ve decided to record my EMDR therapy sessions here. David (my therapist) says I have to box all of these memories up at the end of a session and “put them away” until next time, but I guess he hasn’t figured out yet that I am dweller. I will dwell on these thoughts and feelings […]

1 month ago no Comment

Some things I am learning: Trauma is individual. It is not something that has to be universally horrific to be real. Something that traumatizes one person, may gain a minor or no response in someone else. Because none of us are alike and none of us are wired the same way, we all face the […]

3 months ago no Comment

I sent a video to a friend yesterday. The same kind of video I have sent a ton of times. Just a “hello”, with some encouragement, and positive thoughts. As soon as I made the video, I replayed it (of course) because don’t we all want to see what we look like in video? Now, […]

3 months ago no Comment

It is said that we are influenced most by the 5 people we spend the most time with. These days, my circle is so small it’s almost able to fit in to a chartreuse micro bus. I’m good with that. People that motivate me, make me smile, cheer me on, kick my butt when I […]

3 months ago no Comment

Today is the day we thought about yesterday Yesterday when I went to sleep, I had done something I had never done before. I lifted weight on a bench. A bench press. Chicken little, skinny armed, me did 3 reps of 10 at 45 pounds and let me tell you friends; that shit was hard! […]

3 months ago no Comment

There are many beautiful and unique people in this world. Each one with a different soul, skin tone, voice, heart. We are all different. Not one of us is the exact same. Even twins have minute differences. We are all the only one of us in existence. Current events would lead us to believe that […]